We’ve all gone through difficult times, and when we do, it’s normal to feel bad. Unfortunately, feeling bad or sad tends to makes us feel vulnerable, or sometimes even guilty. We know that our friends and family don’t want to see us suffer, and we don’t want to feel like we are burdening others, so we are tempted to hide our pain.
The truth is, everyone faces loss, whether it’s a loved one, a marriage, a job, or the freedom and ease that come from feeling healthy and pain-free. Although loss is a natural and inevitable part of being human, it isn’t easy to talk about or even, in some cases, think about. Yet, as human beings, self-expression is important and hiding feelings can be stressful — which often makes pain worse. What can we do to feel better?
This may sound odd, but one way to feel better is to simply accept that you feel bad. Here’s an example: Imagine you are chopping vegetables and you cut your finger with a knife. Would it make sense to pretend that the cut doesn’t hurt? Of course not. In fact, acknowledging pain helps you take steps to care for the injury.
Accepting your feelings is a great first step toward feeling better. Once you’ve accepted your feelings, you can find ways to express yourself. Try asking someone you trust if it would be okay to talk about your situation. Tell them they don’t have to offer solutions: all you really need is a friendly ear. To set them at ease, let your loved one know the conversation won’t be long.
Remember, it’s normal to feel bad when you’re in pain. Acknowledging and sharing your “bad” feelings really can help you feel better.